The model and transgender rights activist has revealed that before she started living as a woman she tended to self-harm physically and mentally because of feeling trapped in the male body she hated from the bottom of her heart. “I wasn’t going to share this and didn’t yesterday because I guess there’s still a part of me that feels strange about sharing pre-transition pictures of myself,” she wrote on the first day of the decade at the very first day of 2020 via Twitter. , Bergdorf admitted that she felt lost and unhappy in 2009, she failed to find right words to describe who she was and how she felt. “I had become extremely self destructive, self-harming, self-medicating, not eating, not sleeping, going out every night and seeking validation in the attention of strangers. Basically anything to make me numb,” she wrote, adding that she had only two ways – either to start living as a woman or to suicide. “This is why I won’t shut up about self empowerment, self love and the importance of supporting services that help marginalized young people who are struggling – because I know what it’s like to completely give up on yourself and have others give up on you too,” she concluded.